An Friendly Authoritarian Tale

Merry Christmas, Peasants!

By Santa Klaus

(To be read out loud in a heavy german accent, like Hitler)

Gather round children! I shall tell you the tale of Christmas future.

When I was a young boy in Ravensburg in the motherland, der Führer was in power, and holidays were quite meager. Well, not for all families of course, but for most. Such is the holiday many of you will be partaking in shortly as we enter a time of much-needed change in the world. We must begin from a place of decreased expectations, and though I am in my palace physically, I am with you all in spirit.

When I founded the World Economic Forum, I had a dream of huge aspirations — I had formed my own view of managing the whole world like a finely-tuned machine. I wanted the best of all possible worlds, I was not unlike der Führer in that sense — to have such an enormous vision for how all things should run: like clockwork and with great obedience.

For this special year, in preparation of my Great Reset, many special gifts are coming your way!

Oh, the presents we have in store for you! And I mean all of you! You see that you’ve already received a few gifts a bit early — the new strain of the virus in the United Kingdom, which will surely spread and require stricter lockdowns, or as I like to call it, “more family time”. This staying home saves the earth you know — the pollution has been quite down at such times. This extra family time is coming to your city very soon.

And more gifts are coming to be certain! Some, of course, may be late due to shipping delays. A little humor.

If you’re a good boy or girl, and you always wear your mask and you don’t leave your house if you don’t need to, you might just get some Universal Basic Income! It will be for each country to decide the adequate amount, just be sure to stay on our “good list”. Until of course all borders are removed, then it will be standardized globally.

Some of you still do not understand that the world cannot go on as it is and this is why such a Great Reset is needed. For those who defy the lockdowns, who spread the virus and are responsible for increasing the infections, for those who are…